Tuesday, November 22, 2011

- Rough Patch

If I'm being completely honest...I've had a hard time maintaining my usual level of awesomeness lately.

I guess you could say I have hit a rough patch.  And by that I mean that my body is literally covered in rough patches.

Remember back when I decided to get sick?  But the doctor was all "Oh you don't even really look sick" and we both decided it was a virus and that I should sit in the sun and avoid getting chilled?  Well it turns out that virus was the onset of something called Pityriasis Rosea.  And it is totally a pity.  It's this thing where you get awesome red, scaly itchy spots all over your torso.  By awesome I mostly mean sucky.  Before I knew what it was I went to the dermatologist because I was all - "Dude man will tell me what's up and give me something and fix it".  Except he said this instead: "There's no treatment.  It can last a few weeks or a few months, but will eventually go away on it's own."  And then I slapped him in the face.  Just kidding.  He was a really nice guy and it's not his fault I have really good luck, or really crappy luck...or maybe I am lucky because I mean at least it's not Shingles...or something worse.

Also, let's just all take a moment to be like "Yay Winter!" because otherwise it would be kind of hard to make sure that my neck, chest, back and arms were covered at all times so that no one thinks I will infect them with something gross.  "Don't worry, it's not contagious." is not something I like to say in casual conversation.  Because no one really believes you and they all back away like you're contagious anyway.  I'm officially into week three with "Rosey".  I would like to be optimistic and think I'm headed into the homestretch but let's face it, this is me we're talking about.  Today when I got out of the shower I realized Rosey is still spreading and finding new places to set up shop...so I'm just hoping that my the time my birthday rolls around she's figured out how to quit me.

And as if that's not fun enough...my scalp is in horrible shape.  I've known for a while now that I was lucky enough to inherit my dad's psoriasis but this fall it has just gotten unstoppable.  Side note: fall is apparently a terrible time for skin and allergies.  All of my conditions are worse in the "fall" and apparently so are Emma's - whose nose has been bad for so long that the vet wants to biopsy it.  And she wants me to pay her $300.  Vets should really have a preferred patient program.  Emma and I would totally win at that.  So on top of having to keep most of my skin covered, I also feel like I have to keep my hair in just the right style so that it covers all of the areas where at any given second 2000 skin flakes are ready to jump ship.  That mental image is so sexy, right?  My scalp will hopefully clear up faster than Rosey - but dude man said it was bad enough that I should expect it to take 2-3 weeks.

Dude man did have some good news though...all those moles on my back that look sketch are totally fine!  I guess one out of three isn't too bad!

What I'm saying is that I'm currently running at about 85-90% awesome these days...which may be awesome enough for some, but I hold myself to a higher standard.


3 comments:

Tristan said...

I'm so sorry, Laurie! My husband had the same thing (pityriasis rosea) a couple of years ago and it was horrible! well, mainly it looked horrible... I think his dr said to try to expose the affected areas to sunlight as much as possible but it was winter and honestly, he would scare people away if he was laying out with that crazy rash. I hope yours clears up fast!

Laurie Elaine, Ph.D. said...

You mean my crazy Doctor was right about sitting in the sun?! Thanks though, it's nice to hear someone I else I know had this - not because I'd wish it on anyone, but because I don't feel like such a leper now!

Mams said...

You need a little vitamin D....go set in the sunshine...like in the car or something....love ya!